EingeNel In Action

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, dear family and friends!

I’m sure everybody is curious about how we spent our first ever Kiwi Christmas.  Let me then start by reminiscing how we spend our Christmases back in Malaysia and Philippines.  Since I’m in a nostalgic mood, I’m going back to my earliest memory of Christmas. I think I was about ten (I have a short memory!) and we were living with my aunt and uncles. It was a cozy two-level house with several rooms.  We occupied a big portion of the first floor while the other rooms were being rented out. The second floor was where my aunt and uncles lived.  During Christmas Eve, my brother and I would tie our socks on the window (we figured it would be easy access for Santa there).   The day before Christmas was a busy day for the adults. My lola (grandmother) would be up in the wee hours of the morning for the simbang gabi (Church mass at 4 am).  Christmas for them are either spent in Manila or Bicol province but it would always be with all of us as we either go to Bicol or they would come join us in Manila.  That year, my grandparents took the train early to celebrate Christmas with us in Manila.  My grandfather usually is not so accommodating as he has to forego all those probable customers (he has a thriving bicycle shop in Bicol at that time).  My lola would be in charge of cooking her special sinukmani (sticky sweet rice) and natong (taro leaves in coconut milk) while my mother usually prepares the food for us kids—fried chicken and spaghetti.  I would be busy then cleaning the house so that it would be sparkling clean during Christmas Eve (I really don’t get that, I mean, it’s not as if we’d have guests, so why does it have to be clean?).  My cousin, Vic-Vic, who was also my best friend at that time, was also busy cleaning their house and helping her mother cook their own Noche Buena (literally translated Good Evening but it actually is our Christmas Eve dinner).  My cousin Vic-Vic lived a few steps from us as their family rented the other room in our small compound.  It’s funny that we don’t just have one Noche Buena, instead, each household had to have their own. I never asked why, but it has always been like that.  So on Noche Buena itself, Vic-Vic and I were the messengers as we brought plates of food from our respective households to the other.  A rule in our household that time was that nobody touches the Noche Buena food until the clock strikes twelve but since our stomachs wont be able to last that long, my mother prepares a separate pre-dinner food so that our stomachs wont growl when we attend the Christmas mass at ten.  After the mass, we would all go back to the house and re-heat the food.  Only then we get to eat and open our presents.  Our stockings would still be empty as Santa is only scheduled to drop by on the wee hours of Christmas.  Everybody would end up burping as we fill our tummies with ham, queso de bola (edam cheese ball), sinukmani and other food we’d only have for this special day.  I was the first apo (granddaughter) then so I’d have lots of gifts from everybody but my brother was becoming the baby of the crowd as he charmed them with his toothy smile (he was five then and way cuter too.. haha).  I indulge myself by thinking that my uncles considered me as their favourite niece (they had no choice, I was their only niece at that time).  I got great gifts from them, a bubble watch, game watch and my melody stationery.  I’d go to bed with my Christmas presents beside me.  On Christmas morning, my brother and I will race up to the window to get our socks to find out what Santa has left for us.  In the previous years, Santa has given me a wallet, a watch and some nice stuff so this year, I was expecting something even nicer. Actually, I knew who Santa really was but of course I didn’t want to ruin it for my brother.  But still, I was surprised when I opened my sock and found an apple and a note which said, “Dear Yeng, You’re a grown up girl already and you probably know who Santa is. I hope your gift last night was enough. – Love, Mama and Papa”   As the selfish kid that I was, I wanted more than just an apple. My brother got a new toy to add to his collection.  But then, come to think of it, I have been enjoying gifts from Santa for several years now while he has just been here for about five years and this is his second gift from Santa I suppose.  So ok, I didn’t feel bad anymore. And at least I got an apple, right?  The next year was different for us as there was a big fire in the house that we lived in so we had to move to another place.  (I’ll tell you about the fire in another entry as it would ruin the jovial mood here).  But we still made it a point to spend Christmas Eve or Day together with the big family.  It was that way until I got married, well, minus the socks on the window, even my brother got a note too when he turned ten, I think.

When I got married, I was worried that I’d have to face the dilemma of choosing where to spend Christmas Eve—with my side of the family or with Ronnel’s side?    I guess this has been solved for me when we had to leave for Malaysia.  I didn’t like the solution to the problem but at least not one side would think we’re partial to the other.   So, for the two years when we were in Malaysia, we spent our Christmas with our Filipino friends there.  We would still have our exchange gifts but we added a twist to make it a game.  We would pick a number, choose a gift from the pile and open it in front of everybody.  If your number is higher than the previous one, you get the chance to stay with your gift or get the other person’s gift.  It was always a joint effort for me and Ronnel.  I guess we were lucky as he always got the higher number so even if somebody already took the gift I was interested in, he would just take it back for me. For two straight years, we always went home with the gifts we chose.  When we left Malaysia, I remember giving that same gift I got to the other person who really wanted it during that exchange gift session but had a low number so had to give it up to Ronnel.  I always felt bad for taking that gift away from her so I gave it as my parting gift. 

Ok, so now, let’s stop reminiscing. I’m sure what you really want to know is how we spent our Christmas here in New Zealand. Let me start at work then.  We had our team party at a colleague’s house.  What can I say? It is definitely different from the Christmas parties I am accustomed to.  For starters, this is the first party that we didn’t have rice on the table. What do you expect? This is a whole new world and rice isn’t part of it. Not that I was looking for rice, anyway, I am an Atkin’s advocate anyway so that’s ok with me.  A colleague of mine prepared dinner for everybody and it was really nice. I made macaroni salad for dessert which actually became one of the main dishes since it was so heavy for the tummy.  We had a painting game and I introduced them to the wonders of the magic mic.  I think they enjoyed it since it was a huge improvement over PS2 singstar which only had about 30 songs in one disc. Well, of course, you had to ignore the cumbersome graphics and the minimal grammatical errors in the magic sing. I was really embarrassed when the magic sing flashed, “What A Excellent Singer!” in big bold letters. We were using a projector then so it was glaring big but it didn’t matter to them, my Kiwi officemates just laughed and enjoyed every song in magic sing – even Macarena! 

Aside from the Christmas Team Party, we also had Secret Santa, which to us Filipinos is actually the Kris Kringle.  We had it for nine straight days and the trick was to put the gift on the person’s desk while the person is away.  For the nine days, I only got one gift while some of my colleagues had one every day. My seatmates would tease me and show off their gifts in jest and I would always tell them that my secret santa was probably planning a big big gift for me on the last day.  It was only later did I know that my secret santa was actually indisposed so I had to be forgiving.  It was no big deal for me, Christmas was all about giving anyway, right? And I have received so many gifts and blessings already that I have no right to ask for anything anymore.  So I was really surprised when one day, I found lots of trinkets on my desk and a note from my other secret santa.  Apparently, a seatmate of mine felt bad that I didn’t receive any gift during the Secret Santa period.  Well, I eventually found out who my surrogate not-so-secret Santa and thanked him with a poem via email.  Soon, everyone showed their poetic prowess at work and thanked their own Secret Santas with a poem too.  Here are some poems they sent:

To my Kris Kringle……

When Xmas comes

around next year

                                I will give

a great big cheer

                                      “I hope you

will be my Kris Kringle”

                                     But you probably

won’t I fear

                                        That is the end

of my poem

                                        I hope it finds

you well

                                          Have a Merry

Xmas

                              I hope your

head does not swell

Another one…
To my Secret Santa…

For all they said

and more, cheers,…

But I really just

want to thank you for the beers!

And another one…
                                             Roses are red

                                    Violets are blue

Mine was this one…
To My Other Secret Santa…

Thank you from the bottom

of my heart,

For all the goodies, the

tea, the earrings, and Christmas tart,

I know that you are really

really smart,

To take the place of my real

Secret Santa who now can’t take part,

Of this Christmas game that

Ailua had us start,

You didnt really have to

do this, no need to go to the mart,

But just the same, I’d really

like to thank you from the bottom of my heart.

—-> My Surrogate Secret Santa’s gift to me

On Christmas Eve, Ronnel and I had an early dinner as I prepared roasted Chicken wings and mac n cheese.  We also opened the fruitcake given away by ANZ to its employees plus the half bottle of Chardonay in the fridge.  I think my tolerance for alcohol now is a bit low as I’m face flat on my bed at 10 pm.  But before that, we called our loved ones who were in the Philippines preparing for their own noche buenas.  Thank God for cheap call cards…

On Christmas Day, I woke up early to prepare my specialty – Carbonara.  I knew that this dish would never fail me.  Countless of friends and party acquaintances have asked for my recipe so I had named it SEC (Special Einge Carbonara. Narcissist, am I?).  I used reduced cream and light evaporated milk this time to lower the calorie count.  I set my SEC aside as Ronnel and I went to attend the 9 am Christmas mass.   The church was filled with people as everyone wanted to get that special blessing on the day Christ was born.  My eyes were filled with tears once more when I remember how much blessings we received for the past years. 

At about 1130 am, I got a call from Kuya Nestor that he was on his way to pick us up from our place.  We were going to spend Christmas with his family and that was the reason I prepared my SEC.  At Kuya Nestor’s, his wife, Ate Soc was busy preparing for our Christmas lunch. I met their kids, April and Philip.  Aside from their looks, you wouldn’t think they were Filipinos. They definitely sound Kiwi already.  Ronnel and I will probably have kids like them and we smiled at the prospect.  We really like Kiwi life here and we are looking forward to raising our kids the Filipino way in a Kiwi environment.  The meal prepared was scrumptious! My SEC paled in comparison and I thought of dropping the “S” as it wasn’t so special anymore.  We had Kare Kare with a kiwi twist (Ate Soc put in broccoli instead of the usual Kare Kare veggies),  caldereta with a kiwi twist again (Kuya Nestor put in olives),  ham, baked mussels,  shrimps,  and sweet tarts made by April. I think I weighed 10 pounds more when I left their place.  I whipped out my magic sing (What is a Filipino party without it?) and we sang Christmas carols and old songs.  I made good friends with April that day while his dad belted out his rendition of Abba songs.  I bonded with her as she was the only person in my age group during that time (except for Ronnel but he was busy singing as well).  She showed me her collection of books and I was impressed with how mature she was.  While I was stuck with my fiction romance-mystery novels, she was reading non fiction autobiographies.  I was five years her senior but it felt like the other way around as I browsed her book self.  She lent me a book to try reading and I promised to burn her a copy of Asian movies.  I learned a lot of things about Kiwi teenagers life from her that day and I bet she learned a lot of Filipino stuff from me as well.  What’s more, she also reads signatures! I’ve always read other people’s signatures and I haven’t had mine read so it was refreshing to hear her analyse how I sign my name.  She still had to hone her skills as she missed some points but hey, what are the odds of me meeting another Filipino in Wellington who loves to read, enjoys shopping and reads signatures? It’s just too bad that she’ll be leaving for Auckland next month as she found a teaching job there. (If that wasn’t enough, she also has my dream job!).   So we made an appointment to go shopping the following Thursday so that she can show me her favourite shopping places.

While I bonded with April, Ronnel bonded with the youngest Velasco, Philip, as they played NBA live in his PS2.  It was a close match, but what do you expect, the younger, the faster, the better prevailed.  I think my husband has to stick to playing with me if he wants to win. Haha. 

Kuya Nestor and Ate Soc packed some leftovers for us (tapaws, we call that in Malaysia).  This is very typical of an Asian, and I think it also says something about how thoughtful Filipinos are. Imagine, you already had people coming over to your house to eat and that wasn’t enough, you also pack food for them to bring when they leave. Very nice, isn’t it?  That is why Filipino parties are overflowing with food as we make sure that there is something left for the guests to bring home.   They brought us home via the scenic way which made me dizzy for a while (I am still not used to the winding roads here) and it was a good thing we stopped to admire the ocean or else I would ruin Kuya Nestor’s car mat.  At home, Ronnel and I spent the rest of Christmas day dozing off.

On Boxing Day, Ronnel gave me the best Christmas present.  He told me he won’t be going out shopping with me and that he’d be staying home to play his Wii.  He gave me shopping money and told me to enjoy my time alone.  At that moment, I realized (once more) how I loved my husband so much.  (Told you I was easy to please)  Imagine, a whole day for me to indulge in my addiction – shopaholism!    I heard bells and birds chirping and Ronnel’s voice in the background warning me to spread my shopping money until Thursday since April and I will still be going out to shop.  I went out at about 930 am. The streets were still deserted but when I reached Lambton Quay, one shop called Country Road was teeming with shoppers. As curious as I was, I checked out the merchandise but didn’t want to queue anymore so I left the shop empty-handed.  I went to the shops on sale and was delighted to find out that prices were really slashed. I bought heaps from the shops I’m familiar with – Body Shop, Esprit and Farmers. I bought a shirt and shorts for Ronnel, make up and lotion that I intend to send home to my little sister.  It was only half past noon when I realized that I had no more shopping money left so I texted Ronnel to wait for me as I was going home to have lunch with him. 

The day after Boxing Day (27th) was a working day for Ronnel. As for me, I was on leave as I was preparing myself mentally, physically, emotionally (and all those –allies) for the upcoming years I’ll be spending with BNZ. Yup, I have officially decided to stay on with BNZ.  Remember in my previous post, I mentioned that I only had a 3-month contract with BNZ? Well, I am glad to say that I am now a full pledged permanent employee.  It was a hard decision to make as there were a lot of complexities in the package, plus the market out there for BA’s is really thriving.  For the past weeks that I’ve been checking out the market (ergo job-hunting), I learned that there’s so much out there to learn and to experience for someone like me.  But in the end, after much deliberation with Ronnel, we decided that I stay with the Bank. As I’ve told my boss, in the end, the only thing that matters is where I am happy—and I am happy where I am now. So I chose to stay.  So starting Wednesday, January 3, I am no longer on contract.  I don’t want to speak ahead of myself but I think I’ll be staying with this Bank for a long time.  I mean I am loyal and faithful, remember? If it weren’t for the reason that I had to leave the country, I would still be with my banks in the Philippines and Malaysia.  Plus, my friends know how loyal I am to Ronnel, so there you go… 

Anyway, on the two days after Boxing Day, while Ronnel went to work, I spent my mornings jogging. For the first time in my life, I jogged alone.  And I loved it.  I do not have to pressure myself to jog faster. I can just stop to catch my breath whenever I want (Ronnel hates it when I did this a lot the last time we jogged).  I jogged along Oriental Parade and got to appreciate the things around me – the cool breeze of the ocean, the warm streaks of the sun, the soft cries of the seagulls and pigeons in the sky. With the loud voice of Fergie from my Ipod (a gift from my mom before we left Philippines), I jog happily, thinking of all the blessings I have received thus far.  I couldn’t ask for anything more, well, maybe that the few tummy flabs will disappear after this round. After jogging, I cooled down in the library. I read the book, “Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office” by Lois Frankel.  I highly recommend this to all career women out there.  It gives pointers to women at work on how to further their careers while having a balanced life.   Great read! The next day, after jogging, I went home and prepared for another shopping session – this time, with my new friend, April.  We met at Kirks and had lunch at Wholly Bagels. That was the first time I had a bagel for lunch and it was filling, not quite what I expected.  Since I finished up all my shopping money during Boxing Day, I was on a tight budget (Ronnel upped my limit a bit but I couldn’t bear to spend so much anymore).  April and I circled Kirks and Cuba street a bit but saw nothing that would interest us. We just stopped by a home shop where I bought a pillow (haha! Still couldn’t resist) and a CD shop where April picked up a new CD of a Kiwi band.  Since we were near my home, I showed her our tiny place and rested for a while. As she had to catch the bus home, she went on her way while I had to buy Ronnel’s dinner.  I gave her a small collection of Asian movies to watch when she gets home.  I enjoyed the afternoon with her and felt sad that she had to leave for Auckland soon. 

On the 29th Friday, Ronnel was on leave as we wanted have a New Year couple day-out.  We took the Wellington Cable Car to view the city from a breath-taking angle.  The cable car wasn’t what I expected as I had a different notion of what a cable car was.  Cable car in the Philippines and Malaysia meant a melon-shaped car suspended several meters up the air using cable wires.  It would literally take your breath away as you fear that the cables would snap and you’ll fall into an abyss of rock and dirt. I remember when Ronnel, my brother and I rode a Cable Car when we were in Genting Highlands, Malaysia and the cable car stopped for a few seconds.   Prior to that, there was news that a cable snapped so the cars were out of commission.  That ride was one of the few given out after the fix was made.  I was scared and thrilled at the same time. I said a silent prayer then and I think Ronnel and my brother did too, but of course, were too “manly” to admit.  Anyway, the cable car here was nothing like that. It was a tram hooked to cables and a long rail to bring its passengers up the hill.  It was a short ride but the scenery that awaited was enough to compensate for the not so-scary/thrilling cable car.  There was a botanical garden and a museum where the guests can stay for a while.  After loitering a bit, Ronnel and I went back to the car and headed to a restaurant as our stomachs were growling in agony.  That same night, I gave Ronnel a haircut. Yup, you read it right. I cut Ronnel’s hair! Well, it was actually more of a shave as I used an electric shaver to give him his New Year clean look. Actually, we were still thinking in Pesos and Ringgit and he couldn’t fathom how a haircut here could cost 60 dollars. I think we’re still in the comparing currencies stage and we still can’t let go of how cheap things were back in Phils/Malaysia. Maybe we need a few more years here. In the meantime, I will be Ronnel’s personal hairdresser.

On New Year’s Day, Ronnel and I just stayed at home. We forgot to buy a phone card so we failed to call our loved ones back home. We just texted them our greetings and wished them a prosperous new year.  I miss the New Year celebrations in the Philippines, especially the yearly reunions we spend with Ronnel’s family.   Their family is really extended but close-knit as they all live nearby (imagine, four families within steps away from each other).   Every New Year’s day, they have this all day celebration where each family brings food and presents.  But what I miss most is the grocery game.  They have this game where you will have to bring some stuff (preferably new) for “sale” in the game.  All participants must have at least two items I think and you get to buy from the other participants based on the cards dealt to you (i.e. Kings would give you the chance to choose 3 items, Queen – 2 items and so on). I forgot the details but it’s something like that.  I enjoyed being part of this as everybody brought really nice stuff and I get to practice my shopping skills without actual exchange of currencies.  Hmm.., maybe, time will come that I can play it here with my friends too.

So on New Year’s Day, we are just cooped up in our place, surfing the net for new movies and dramas to download.  I installed new software in my phone (I got the Handi TV so that I can watch TV in my phone – how cool is that!) while Ronnel ironed our clothes. He does ironing twice a month now to save power so he ends up with a pile of clothes fortnightly.  Since it was New Year and I am a Filipino with superstitious streaks, I cooked pansit (rice noodles) which was deemed to bring prosperity and long life. I also wore polka dots so that money would pour in. Well, I’m not sure how effective this is but my family has been doing this for all the new years and so far, we are all still alive and kicking. 

So there, that’s how we celebrated our first Kiwi Christmas and New Year.  On Wednesday, both of us will be back at work and will be doing our very best to ensure that the blessings we’ve received so far won’t go to waste.  I know Ronnel is now settled in his role and is getting more and more confident everyday.  Who knows, he may be the “sifu” just as he was back in Maybank.  As for me, I have still so much to learn in my role in BNZ and I am excited to go in full throttle.  You know me, when I am into something, I put my whole heart into it.  That’s why you have to bear this epic-proportions blog as I couldn’t just tell you what happened with just a few words… I hope you enjoyed my entry and now, you can close your eyes for a bit, they probably need a well-deserved rest…

Up Clause and Personal

It has been a very busy week for us and that means more pictures and stories for you, my blog readers… For starters, last Saturday, Ronnel and I went to the movies.  Yup, it is a very very rare occasion for us to go to the movies. Imagine, we were in Malaysia for two whole years and we only went to the movies four times! It’s not that we don’t want to watch movies, in fact, it’s the opposite. We watch movies everyday… at home!  Well, thanks to our favourite torrent sites, we get to watch the latest movies at no cost at all, except for the internet connection of course.  But of course, watching movies at the movie house offers a different experience so there we were, at Courtney Place’s Reading Cinema, enjoying Tim Allen’s new Santa Clause movie. The movie was really good but maybe we’re biased because we both love Tim Allen, all the way back to his Home Improvement days.   Anyway, we thought that Reading Cinema was called that way because there were subtitles or it’s a movie house for the deaf and thanks to Paul, we learned that it wasn’t that, they just called it Reading Cinema, as a brand. 

Part-ay!

On Tuesday, BNZ Technology (this is the IT Division of BNZ, just like ISI for BPI and Scope for Standard Chartered) held its Christmas party at the Boatshed– a multi function hall near the lake. As it was my first official NZ party, I didn’t know what to expect.  It was supposed to be a summer theme but the weather wasn’t cooperating so it was hard to wear a sun dress or short shorts.  However, since there was an award for the best dressed, some braved the cold weather and wore summer outfits.  Our team went to the $2 shop to buy some beach balls and inflatable tubes but it was so funny coz they were for kids and couldn’t really fit our waists. (Ok, I know Wilson and the guys at Scope are already thinking, “Haha, it’s not small, you’re just fat, Einge.” My retort is, “Sorry guys, I’m not fat here, just curvy. And, I know you guys miss teasing me.)

We Gotta Wiiiiiiiii

I guess you would have known by now just by looking at our avatars in YM that we got a Nintendo Wii! Well, it’s actually my Christmas present for Ronnel, knowing that he’s crazy about these game consoles. (He gave me a new battery for my phone and it’s a little pricey coz we had to have it shipped from Australia. They dont have it here in NZ. Good thing, he still had some credit left in his Maybank credit card.) Anyway, Ronnel was thinking of getting either the xbox 360 or the Wii and I went for the Wii coz it’s really a different gaming experience. It’s like you’re really bowling or playing tennis and stuff.  Ok, for those who have no idea what I am talking about, check this out : http://www.wii.com .  Anyway, we pre-ordered the Wii from a local gaming shop, EB Games, as it was scheduled for launch on midnight of December 6.  So on Thursday, at around 11 pm, Ronnel and I were at the shop together with other game freaks, queuing to be the first ones in the whole of New Zealand to have the Wii.  We had our first Wii game on a Friday night and it was really fun.  It’s the first time (ever!) that I beat Ronnel in sports, bowling even! I am very bad at any kind of sports, despite my sporty look.  My friends told me that at first glance, they thought I was very athletic but they immediately changed their minds when they saw me play in whatever sports they asked me to.  I honestly don’t know why. It’s not that I do it on purpose. I try my very best, I put my whole body and mind into the task, but I still find my face flat on the floor.  My P.E. in the university was volleyball, bowling, aikido and cheering (not cheer dancing, but the one where you have to shout and cheer for the team).  That was in that order because on my first semester, I wanted to check if my bad luck from high school would carry over to the university. Well, it did.  I nearly flunk volleyball because I always miss my serves, I look far away, thinking I hit the ball, when in fact it was just on my foot. I was able to up my score because there was an option to write a thesis about it. I aced the thesis and flunked the practical. In bowling, I had a passing mark but only because my prof took pity on me and gave me a mark for effort.  On the third sem, I veered away from balls so I took Aikido. It was still a disappointment.  I couldn’t fall correctly and all the energy I could get from my opponent was used against me instead of the other way around. Again, thanks to the thesis requirement, I passed.  So for the last semester, I made sure I wasn’t going to involve myself in any kind of activity that requires me to move, thus, I went for cheering.  All I had to do there was attend my university team’s games against other schools and cheer for my team. I had a high score in that class. Yay!

Ok, so back to the Wii. Since this wasn’t really sports per se, it wouldn’t be a surprise if I was good at it. Imagine? My score in bowling was 144 points!  I remember back in our Scope bowling team, I barely got a 60 and I cried in the washroom because I was ashamed of myself, thinking I pulled my team down and it was all because of me that we didn’t win or something. Of course, my friends told me that it was just a fun game and it didn’t matter if we won or not but I felt bad just the same, and as you all know, I am a cry baby. I cry in the movies, I cry when I read a book, heck, I even cry on those touching TV commercials. Oops. I’m talking about myself again and not the Wii. Anyway, the Wii is a great game. You can create your own character, called the “Mii” and just like an Avatar, make it look exactly like you.  Thanks to Nintendo for coming out with this. Because of Nintendo, I have regained my confidence in sports.. hahahaa

Saturday Shopping Stravaganza
Have I told you I met another Filipino friend in BNZ?  Well, my boss introduced me to Ate Jojo as they were under the same team years before.  Ate Jojo and her family have been in NZ for more than 18 years and they were practically Kiwis.  Ronnel and I had lunch with her and a friend of hers last Thursday. It was a filling lunch, from food and stories.  We learned a lot as they gave us tips on driving, buying a house and a lot of other things to watch out for in Wellington.  She asked me if I wanted to go visit a Filipino store on Saturday. How could I refuse? (Shopaholic mii, remember?) So on a Saturday afternoon, Ate Jojo picked me up from our place.  Ronnel was left at home as he was playing with his Wii, I guess he couldn’t accept the fact that he lost to me in bowling. (enter my devil laugh….mwahahaha!)  Ate Jojo brought her mom along as we drove to a well known Filipino shop somewhere there (I am geographically challenged).  I bought boy bawangs, nagaraya and other Filipino stuff.  After that, we dropped by Pak n Save. I guess it was the NZ counterpart for the hypermarts like SM and Carrefoure. But the really cool thing in Pak n Save is that you get to pack your own stuff.  I mean you have to bring bags to save on plastic bags, I suppose.  I didn’t bring bags so I had to buy from them. I got too caught up in shopping that I didn’t realize I almost filled my cart! In total, I filled 2 bags plus 2 boxes.  I knew Ronnel would eat me alive if he saw how many I bought (and how much I spent!) so I sent him an SMS, warning him that I bought enough stuff to last the whole year (well, it was December.. hehehe).  We stopped by Johnsonville mini-mall (all malls here are mini-malls for me, waaaah) to have a late lunch and they drove me home.  When Ronnel saw how much I bought, he just joked about it. Hmm… I was actually expecting to be reprimanded and I had all these arguments on my defence.  I mean, he had to carry about four bags and two small boxes of grocery (Ate Jo even had to help us) and he didn’t scold me or anything? And then I realized why… it was the Wii! He was playing all day and he was in a good mood. I think he mastered bowling already and was ready to take me on anytime.  Told ya, the Wii gives a whole new meaning to gaming.

Watch out for my next entry as we will be holding our own team Christmas party. I’ll be introducing my new Kiwi friends to the magic of the Filipino Magic Mic!

How comforting it is to know that we are not the only Filipinos in Wellington, let alone in the respective banks we work in!  In BNZ alone, there are about over ten Filipinos and I’ve met most of them.  In ANZ, Ronnel has several Filipino officemates but two of them were leaving New Zealand as their contract was finished.  So we were invited to attend the farewell party, the despedida, that was held for these two pinoys.

Our First Pinoy Party

It was drizzling a bit when we went to meet Ronnel’s officemate, Philip, in McDonald’s Lambton Quay on a Saturday afternoon.  We were a few minutes late since it was a long walk from our place.  After meeting Philip at McDo, we dropped by his place for a while to pick up the food they prepared.  The party was potluck so everybody had to bring their own contribution.  I’m sure you know what I brought. What else could it be but my default time and taste-tested S.E.C. (Special Einge Carbonara)? My carbonara hasn’t failed me when I prepared it for my officemates in BPI (Philippines) and friends in Malaysia.  It is palatable regardless of ethnicity and background… and I was hoping that it will get the same reception here. Well, it kinda did.  I got one or two nice comments about it but it was better received back in those two Asian countries. It could be the cheese. My secret ingredient (well, it’s not secret anymore coz I’m telling you, right?) is Kraft Eden Cheese and well, they don’t have it here. I even dreamt about one shop that had it. Ok, back to the party. 

At Philip’s place, we met two other Filipinos. We stopped by another house and on we went to our final destination, the host’s place.  The host was a well-known figure in the Filipino community here in NZ. He is the moderator of pinoys2nz yahoo groups and the UP (University of the Philippines) Wellington e-groups.   His place was really nice. They told me he bought the area first then designed the house.  The party was about to start and Filipinos from different sides of the city were pouring in. There were about 20 of us then, and mostly, aged late twenties and early thirties.  It was our age group and it was nice to get to know how fascinating their move to NZ was. It was like the Filipino Diaspora told in different colours. There were lots of food, barbeque, shrimp, chicken, and of course my waiting-to-be-tasted carbonara.  They had a sports fest before and we watched the recorded footage of some games they had.  And of course, since it is a Filipino party, it was Videoke time! Out came the Magic Mic. Ronnel and I had to undergo an “initiation” rite to start the singing session. We did our rendition of Cher’s “Believe” which we usually sang at home (yup, we too had a magic mic. Haha!).

The party ended at about ten but apparently, for some of them, it was just starting.  We were invited to go to another house to continue with the Magic Mic session. We went along since we also wanted to spend more time hearing about their experiences in NZ. The stories could be different for each but there was one thing in common – going to NZ was never in their original plan.  It was like everything fell into place for them and led them here, much like how it was for us (refer to entry “Finally in NZ.”).  They told us that they usually spend their fortnight weekends like this, having fun singing and drinking up to four in the morning.  We had to leave a bit early (about 2 am) and they were kind enough to bring us home since we didn’t have a car and we didn’t know how to go home .   We were a little embarrassed that we couldn’t stay and it was reminiscent of the times we had in Malaysia. I remember Ronnel and me being called the “Cinderella Couple” because we had to leave parties and gatherings before the clock strikes twelve.  I guess the sad experience Ronnel had staying up late before in BPI made us quite mindful of the time we go to sleep.  (Side story: Ronnel had a problem with his lymph nodes when he had to work endless nights back in BPI. A big lump grew  near his right jaw line and the doctor had to manually extract the pus inside. We were scared that it was a cyst and that he had to undergo biopsy but thank God, it wasn’t. The doctor then advised Ronnel to get enough sleep. Hmmm… come to think of it, Ronnel gets into a lot of weird health problems, doesn’t he? Remember the great tragic Malaysian basketball accident?)  Anyway, it’s hard to explain to others that we have to sleep early. Well, technically, it’s just Ronnel, but since we are conjugal, that covers me as well. Plus, Ronnel says he can’t sleep without me by his side.  So, we limit our activities to day time and well, we enjoy it that way.  Sometimes, I marvel at how much both of us have changed over the years.  I remember I was a party girl back when I was in the university. I didn’t stay home much and went out all the time. I was dubbed the “Alanis Morissette” of my org, with my long black wavy hair and groovy clothes. I could down two bottles of Red Horse (the most potent beer on earth) and can still walk straight (oops, hope my parents aren’t reading this).  I was active in six different orgs and still manage to show up in class. It did wonders to my system and sometimes, I felt like a zombie – partying at night and clueless at daylight.   Ronnel was my exact opposite.  He was an ideal student and son.  He helped in his family business, was active in his favourite sport (basketball), spent time with his younger brothers and found time to study (although he didn’t really need to, well, except for Accounting. But that’s a loooooong super unrelated story).  I guess that’s why a lot of people were surprised when they found out that Ronnel and I were going out. I even heard that there was an on-going bet on how long we would last a couple. (enter Shania Twain, Looks like we made it…)  Anyway, where was I? (Sorry, I have this knack of always going off-topic). As I’ve said, I marvel at how much Ronnel and I have changed over the years.   I’ve mellowed down while he became a little more outgoing.  I didn’t party at night anymore
and he learned to appreciate shopping (my fave activity) and going out.

A Sunny Sunday Special


We were late for church on Sunday since we slept late the
night before.  We make it a point to attend the 9 am mass and we’re usually early coz it’s a little embarrassing to be late. You had to open the big heavy doors of the church and people tend to turn their heads when the door opens. Anyway, today was also a special day since we were meeting Kuya Nestor and his wife, Ate Soc. Kuya Nestor is an officemate of mine in BNZ. I stumbled on his name in an org chart of the Development Team. Looking at his name, I guessed he was a Filipino and decided to call him up.  Well, my guess is right.  I went to his work place and introduced myself.  Apparently, he has been in NZ for the past 16 years and joined BNZ only eight months ago. He has raised his family here and has three wonderful children.  He invited me and Ronnel to have lunch at his place so there we were to meet them, on the Sunday morning mass.   It was a wonderful day for sight seeing so they drove us along the Oriental Parade, all the way to Island Bay. We passed by the long seaside and saw people on the beaches (there was an Iron man Timex event being held that time).  We dropped by the Warehouse (yay, shopping again!) where Ronnel and I bought some stuff for our house. We took the scenic route so it took us about half an hour to get to his place, otherwise, it would have been eight minutes only. It was all worth it. At their home, they both prepared lunch for us. Kuya Nestor barbequed while Ate Soc cooked sinigang and chop suey.  It was a very sumptuous lunch, but most of all, we enjoyed their company. They told us stories of how they came to New Zealand and how it was so different sixteen years ago.  Kuya Nestor was into gardening so he showed us the different plants he had in his backyard. After lunch, they brought us to the shooting location of Lord of the Rings. I got to appreciate how good a director Peter Jackson is as we saw the different spots used in the film.  They also brought us to the LookOut, the highest peak in Wellington, where we could see the whole city.  It was a great day out for Ronnel and me.  They brought us home and we invited them to our little flat. We had to warn them that they might have to squeeze in and suck in air before they go in coz our flat was really small.  We ended doing the very same thing we did the night before – sing with the Magic Mic! 

And Darkness Falls

I meant that literally. When Kuya Nestor and Ate Soc left, I started cooking and preparing our food for the coming week while Ronnel did some ironing. I baked banana bread and was preparing our dinner so I switched on the stove.  And came a big PLOP!  Then everything became dark.  The power tripped!  Ronnel played around with the fuse box but nothing happened. We couldn’t call anybody coz it was Sunday night.  So we had to sleep in the dark. I was particularly concerned about the food that I had just prepared because the fridge has no power and the food inside might get spoiled.  Well, to make the story short (coz your eyes are probably tired from reading my looong entry),  an electrician came over the next day to fix the main fuse box.  And the food was still ok… we had it for lunch today.

(Note: If you haven’t read my previous entries, I  suggest you do so to have a better understanding of my rants and raves, mostly raves though, below.)

Our First Project Runway

Who says what you learned in school can’t be used in real life? Well, I’ll be the first to say, No-uh! It’s about two weeks before Ronnel receives his pay and we were running low on finances. We were holding on to what’s left of our pocket money and we had to make the most of what we have. That’s why at our flat, we had a lot of improvised stuff— we had an improvised tabo (please refer to previous entry, "My First Number Two" for full explanation), recycled containers and we shared a toothbrush case (just the container, not the toothbrush itself).  We bought some basic items like a quality peeler, ladle, printer and a blender.  But for someone like me who loves to cook and bake but hates cleaning up, an apron is an absolute necessity. So we scoured the whole city for a cheap apron and couldn’t find any. All aprons cost $30 and above. I couldn’t allow myself to spend that much money for an apron though so I had a brilliant idea. Why not make one myself? Ok, so I went back to my 6th grade memories of how to make an apron and I remembered it wasn’t that hard. So Ronnel and I went to this textile shop and looked for the cheapest apron material. We found some loose cloth for sale and it was perfect, except for the color– which was dung brown. But that’s ok. I could live with that.   And so on a Saturday afternoon, this cute couple, Einge & Nel, were down on the floor, cutting and sewing their first project runway special. Ronnel did the threadin while I did the sewing. When my hands hurt, Nel asked if I could show him the back stitch so he can continue my work. Alas! His back stitch was even straighter than mine. So after three straight hours of toiling, we had made my apron! And it only costs $10, plus I had extra cloth for pot holders and stuff. Nel even wanted me to make him a pair of trousers. Ok, now, let’s not go overboard…

My First Office Party

At
work, we have lots of tea(m) meetings. It’s basically a meeting between
teams but with food. I guess it’s the same anywhere you go. Food is a
great motivator. I remember in Standard Chartered when we had to work
on Saturdays and Sundays, our boss then would let us get any food we
like. I was the designated order-taker and I was practically the most
frequent customer of Dominos.  My colleagues and I would order lots and
lots of pizza to last the whole day (we were at work usually from day
till night) and I was a bit worried that it would cost a lot so I told
my boss my concern. I remember her telling me not to worry about the
cost coz this is nothing compared to the effort we exerted and for
working night and day for this project.  I looked at my colleagues then
and realized that yeah, food is a great motivator. So back to my real
topic.  Last Friday was the birthday of one of my officemates in BNZ.
We had a small gathering to celebrate her birthday. There was an
abundance of wine, cheese, crackers and strawberries.  It was the first
time I drank champagne at 4 in the afternoon! But the ambience was
enough to make me feel it was night time. The people were great. I
suppose as anybody would be in a new environment, I still had to
adjust. I have to practice my listening skills to understand what
everybody was saying and I bet they had a hard time understanding my
accent too. But just like how it was in Malaysia, I’m betting that we
would "get" each other perfectly as time passes. But in the meantime, I
think we’ll have to use a lot of "Pardon?, I’m sorry, and Can you say
that again?".  Sorry for the segue ways again. Now, back to the party.
I didn’t know the birthday girl too much since it has just been a
couple of days since I met her but I believe she’ll be as great as all
the others at work. I never felt so welcome in my life. I guess for an
Asian like me, this is all just overwhelming. It’s the first time I
received more than three compliments in a day. Just because I did some
spreadsheet, I had been called "Super, champion, Great" in different
occasions. At first, I didn’t know what to say. I actually replied,
"You too!"  You see, back where I worked (in both banks), we show our
appreciation with a mere thank you and that’s enough for us, anything
more than that would be over the top. So you’d understand why I’m a bit
overwhelmed with all the "happy" words I get here. I’m not saying it’s
better here because I don’t think it’ll work if we do it in either
Philippines or Malaysia.  I think people will think you’re crazy if you
give out too many compliments and they’d think you’re insincere. I
guess that’s sort of a reverse psychology where we work hard so that we
can get the boss to part with that oh-so-hard-to-get compliment.  Ok,
back to the party. My officemates were a fun bunch. Someone played an
80’s TV soundtrack cd and it was funny to hear the music from Knight
Rider, Doogie Howser and MacGyver. There were free pretend-dance
lessons. I learned how to do the big box, little fish dance and could
now brave the dance floor anytime. I didn’t feel left out even if I was
really a newbie. But I also didn’t feel patronized just because I was
new. I was just there. It was a fun time and surprisingly, I had fun
myself.  I had doubts and fears on how to mingle with them coz however
you look at it, I am different– not just in color, accent or culture
but I guess in a lot of things too. But one thing I’m sure of is that I
never felt different when I’m with them. I felt I was blending! And
that’s a big accomplishment for me.

Our First Pay Check
It
was payday!  Well, at least it was for Ronnel but not for me. It wasn’t
my second week yet so I don’t get my pay till next week. But that
doesn’t count coz I don’t get to touch it anyway. Ronnel and I had an
agreement that my salary will be our savings (down payment for a loan
to buy a house) while his salary will be for our daily expenses. That’s
fine with me since that’s what we did back in Malaysia anyway.

It
was a big disappointment for the both of us when we found out how much
Nel received. Tax was 39% so you could imagine our dismay when we saw
his take home pay. All my dreams of getting a new digicam and food
processor ended quickly. I had to do some budget re-prioritization. But
we were ok with the tax being so much. It was because you really could
see where your taxes went. Unlike in the Philippines where the
government has to constantly remind us by putting up big billboard of
"This is where your taxes go.", here, there is no need to.  Remember,
the library that was to die for? Plus, all the services here are fast
and of quality. It took us only a few days to get our tax number and
hopefully, our permanent residency application won’t take long too.

Ok,
so what was the first thing we did with Nel’s pay? We bought pizza! It
was no ordinary pizza, I tell you. You see, beside the flat where we
lived was a pizza place called "Hell". Everyday for the past few weeks,
we would pass by Hell and smell the aroma of pizza. It was absolute
torture. People were coming out of Hell with boxes of pure pleasure
with devilish grins on their faces. So we promised ourselves that once
we have money, we will get one of those devilish grins ourselves. So on
a sunny Friday afternoon, we went to Hell and ordered Lust, a pizza
with pepperoni and salami on top. On the counter, there was this box of
small foil packets. I thought they were chilli sauce or something so I took
one. The pizza guy also gave us two so we were really surprised when we
saw what was inside. You’ll never guess what it was. (Parental Guidance
advised) Well, as you’re at the edge of your seat,  I am going to tell
you– it was a condom. We were perplexed on how a condom and a pizza
were related. I mean, does eating pizza make you want to fornicate? No
offense or malice intended here– I am just wondering whether there is
a scientific explanation for that. Hmm, now I bet you’re wondering what
we did after eating the pizza. That’s a secret.

My First Fix
I was having withdrawal symptoms. It has been a few weeks now since I’ve been in a shopping mall. You see, here in the city, there are no big malls. I like the shops, as they are lined up on the streets and very accessible during lunch time. But if you came from a country that has over ten big shopping malls (at least 1000 sqm), then Wellington is a big disappointment. I was getting grouchy already so Ronnel obliged me and told me we were going to Westfield this weekend. I didn’t waste time. During lunchtime, I asked my officemates for directions on how to go to Westfield. The guys at work just couldn’t get what it is with malls and women. They say it’s as if the mall is our turf. For me, its more of a temple. My husband says I have a different aura when I’m in a mall, it’s as if I’m in a trance. (note: You might want to read my previous entry, "Confessions of a Shopaholic").

So last Saturday, we woke up early and took a train to Waterloo, which is near the mall. The train ride brought back childhood memories when my grandparents and I took the train to Bicol (my province in the Phils.). The scenery was marvelous. You’ll see the sea when you look out the window. Of course my husband’s over-excited imagination prompted him to say stuff like what if there was a huge gush of wind that blew the whole train into the sea or there was a collision or something like that. But nothing could dampen my spirit — I was going to the mall!

It was a long walk from the train station. I could hear my husband saying things like his feet hurt or something. Me? I was just focused on one goal- to get to the mall. While we were walking, we couldn’t help but admire the houses. They were typical suburb houses just like those in Wisteria Lane (Desperate Housewives). We talked about having our own home someday. Hopefully, that someday will be eight months from now.

Ok, so now we were a few steps away from the mall. It was different from the malls that we had in the Philippines and Malaysia. First, it wasn’t that big. It was like Amcorp in Malaysia or Ever Commonwealth in the Philippines. That was fine with me. It was still a mall.  A familiar feeling rushed over me the moment I stepped in the mall. I had my fix. I think my face could have been ripped by how wide my smile was. There was an array of shoe stores, dress shops and book stores.   We wanted to eat at the food court but there was no more place to sit so we went to a Japanese restaurant. We bought some household items from the Warehouse (similar to Jaya Jusco / SM) and spent a lot of time at the $2 dollar shop. Best of all, Nel bought me shoes! (Thanks again, Maybank Credit Card.) We went up to the third floor to check what was showing in the movies but we didn’t find any that we wanted to see so we decided to go home. That’s fine with me. I’ve had my fix. Hmmm… How long do you think this fix will last?

Our First Outing
Haven’t I mentioned enough that the people here are really nice?  A proof of that is Ronnel’s new office best mate, Paul (I think I mentioned him in my previous entry).  Paul offered to bring us to a well known Filipino shop and to show us sea view, which as exactly the name says, is a very nice view of the sea. So on a windy Sunday, after we went to church and bought some fruits and veggies from the market, Paul picked us up from our flat and drove us all the way to Woburn, where the Filipino mart was. Paul was very warm and friendly. He was easy to talk to and he had a sense of humor to boot, so the drive there wasn’t boring at all— although I was worried ‘coz he kept on looking at the backseat while I was talking, considering that he was driving. But the road was empty so there were no other cars to fend off. When we got to the store, I quickly searched for the most important ingredient for Adobo– Datu Puti Vinegar! It costs nearly $3 which was thrice the price in the Philippines but ofcourse when you factor in the tax, cargo expenses and stuff,  think $3 is pretty much reasonable. Yay! I would now be able to cook Adobo (although I still couldn’t get how my mother in law does her Adobo, mine tastes somewhat different but Ronnel has no choice but to eat it, doesn’t he?).  I bought bagoong (shrimp paste), balayan (anchovies sauce), laurel leaves and other stuff that I failed to bring from the Philippines. I think I spent almost $30 in that store alone. If Ronnel hadn’t looked at me funny, I would have spent more. After that, Paul drove us around Petone and showed us where he used to live, went to school and where he practically grew up. (sidestory: Nel & I were arguing on how to pronounce this-  Pet-wan or pe-tow-ni, the latter being my choice. Nel was saying that the first one has more French sound to it so that should be it. So thanks Paul, for clearing that up. It was pe-tow-ni. Just shows  that I’m right most of, if not all, the time. Hah!) We had lunch at Cobb n Co, a western cowboy style restaurant, which had a great view of the sea. The food was great, moreso the company. After lunch, Paul brought us to Kmart. We also passed by the Outlet store (I will bug Nel to bring me there someday.) and Johnsonville, which they said, was where most Filipinos in NZ live. It was our first time to have a drive outside Wellington and we had great fun. It made Ronnel temporarily forget about the heap of clothes he had to iron when we get back home. But once at home, we were back to reality, I had to prepare our baon (packed lunches) for the coming week while my dutiful husband had to remove the creases on our clothes. We had a great weekend and we were ready for another week of adventure. Till next week! (Next week, we’ll be attending a Filipino party with some of Ronnel’s Filipino officemates.)   

It’s been over a week since we’ve arrived in Wellington and so far, so good… I just want to share with you some “firsts” that I have experienced over the past week. Excuse the picture quality though, I tried to make it clearer thru Photoshop but with all my phone’s complexity, its camera really suck, big time! I promise to post pictures with decent quality once we get a nice camera.

Our First Eviction

Before we left the Philippines, Ronnel booked a 3-night 4-day stay in Hotel Ibis (Thanks, Maybank Credit Card!) as we were hoping that I would be able to find an apartment within three days. Sadly, apartment hunting is not that easy in an unfamiliar place. Good thing there was the Internet to rely on to look for vacancies but we were still unable to find one before our check out time… so, we thought we could just extend our stay in Hotel Ibis. But no! The hotel was fully booked and we had to find another place to stay ASAP! We were given an extra night (of course with full charge!) though. So, the night before our “eviction”, we roamed the city looking for a new hotel to move into. We tried other hotels (too expensive), hostels (fully booked), ventured into some motels (but was scared so we chickened out) and finally, we found one near an apartment we pre-booked. It was a little scary though since this hotel was situated in an area where there were a lot of strip clubs (much to my dismay and Ronnel’s glee). There was an adult store a few blocks away and there were a lot of posters about Strip Contests. There was even a big ad on a strip joint’s wall recruiting “fresh new ladies”. What do you mean by that?

My First Real Spa Experience

Ok, so we’re now in Comfort Hotel and I had a lot of time to spare since I found an apartment already (see below). Ronnel was at work and I don’t wanna spend money outside anymore so I’d rather stay in the hotel. The hotel had this Bath Spa Room and I was curious to try it. With the rush of our departure from the Philippines, we didn’t have time to go to a spa plus my back was aching from the heavy bags we lifted from the airport. Anyway, I didn’t know what to expect since I never tried a private spa before. I thought it was a steam room so I exercised a bit in my room to initiate the sweating. When I opened the private spa room, I was surprised to see this big deep tub. Ok, so that was the Spa. At first, I didn’t know how to operate it. The Kohler knobs were so confusing. When I eventually learned (by trial and error) how things worked, I went into the tub. Whoa! It was a heavenly experience. It’s hard to describe but the knobs were doing something to the water which massages the body’s pressure points (back, shoulders, legs and feet). I could have easily fallen asleep and drowned in the water which was knee-deep (standing up). The sweet smell of peony flowers permeated into the air, mixing with the low buzz of the massaging knobs. Needless to say, this Spa experience was the best ever (and no cost too!).

My First Near-Death Experience (don’t let the title fool you)

So after the spa, I met Ronnel for lunch. He had to go back to work and I, again, have lots of time to spare, before I meet him after work. I logged on to the Internet for a while, checked my mail and chatted with a few friends. After that, I walked around the city and decided to visit the National Library. My heart stopped beating the moment I stepped in the library. There were gazillion of books to read! Ok, so this is what heaven’s like for a bookworm like me. I went into the best seller section and saw that all the books there were brand new. All the Dan Brown stuff was categorized as old stuff already. There were four floors in the library. The ground floor was for the best sellers, romances, adventure and other “just came in” books. There was a separate section for children and young adults. On the second floor was a coffee shop where yes, you can read while drinking coffee. The third floor had books used in school and research. The fourth, I guess, had news clippings and other artefacts. I picked a book from the best seller section entitled “How to Kill a Husband and other household tips”. I went to the far end of the library where there were comfortable seats and you could tuck your feet under. I spent my whole afternoon reading the book and I found it really funny. It was really insightful. Husbands should read them too! I couldn’t force mine though.

My First Number Two (Due to the graphic description in this entry, reader discretion is advised).

One of the biggest challenges every Filipino faces in a foreign country is how to do Number Two without a tabo. For those who are not familiar with the wonders of the tabo, let me explain what it is. Well, I searched the Internet for the direct translation of the tabo and found none, I think the closest word would be “dipping pail”. It’s basically this small pail with a handle that one uses to get water out of a big pail. I believe most Asian countries have the equivalent of this. I’ve seen some used in Korean and Japanese dramas. We didn’t have one in Malaysia but we didn’t need it there because they had the bidet. Ok, so now let’s go back to my dilemma. The long flight from the Philippines to Wellington made my tummy a little queasy and I just knew I had to do Number Two in the hotel. I’m betting Ronnel had to go as well from the look upon his face. When we were in our room in Hotel Ibis, the first thing that I did was to check out the toilet. Of course there was no tabo, but that’s ok since I found a cup that could be a stand in for the real tabo. Anyway, while we are in the subject of this toilet stuff, I might as well share to you something I have learned from watching Oprah. Apparently, you can know how healthy (or unhealthy) you are just by looking at your stool. Someone at work said that as Business Analysts, we check out what comes out of the rear end. Funny, but honestly, I personally do that. I bet you do that too, it’s just that it’s not a thing that we often discuss with others, right? I mean, how weird would that sound? Imagine me asking you, “So what’s the shape of yours this morning?” Hahaha. Anyway, you can have a first health check by checking the shape of your stool. A normal stool is S-shaped since the passage way to the anus is curved so excretions pooled from the large intestine passes through the curves which should be malleable enough to acquire an S-shape. Well, for quite some time, I’ve had marble-type ones and that’s an indication of constipation. But I’ve noticed that recently, I’ve had no problems going to the loo in the mornings anymore. Maybe because we have fruits for breakfast everyday for the past week or so. Anyway, that’s one of the things I love most about NZ. Fruits and veggies are so accessible and affordable too. I remember my friends calling me a goat back at work coz I had salad every lunchtime. Back in the Philippines and Malaysia, I had some difficulties finding a variety of fresh veggies to put on my salad but here, I won’t have to face that problem anymore. Yay!

Our First NZ Home… for eight months

As I’ve said, apartment hunting isn’t fun when you don’t have all the time in the world (and money too). So, I just checked the two apartments (they call them “flats” here) which are within our budget. The first one was as small as our hotel room (and our hotel room was reeeeally small). It was so small that you only had to take a step and you’re in the kitchen and another, you’re out the door. I believe the sink in the kitchen was the same one used in airplane washrooms. If I were to fry something in the kitchen, I think the oil would splatter across the bed. It was that small. But because we had a tight budget, I was about to consider it if there was nowhere else to stay. I checked out another flat and I thought it was lovely. It was a long walk though from our office but I think we needed the exercise anyway. It was still tiny (our budget was tiny too), but it perfectly fit a newlywed couple (we’re practically newlyweds coz everything is new to us here). There were a lot of other couples interested to rent the place and we crossed our fingers that we’d be chosen. I said a silent prayer, hoping that everything will fall into place (as it always did). And it did. The agent instantly liked me (who won’t?) and wanted to meet Ronnel as well. She talked to the owner if we could move in sooner as we had to leave the hotel in a few days. We met the owner on a Saturday morning when he was still in a hurry to clean the flat. We felt sorry for rushing him out of his place but he said it worked out the best for both sides. He said, we were the perfect tenants. And he was God’s gift to us. In these days where our finances were running low and our salaries are yet to be given (on the fortnight), we had to tighten our belts and save as much as we could. I was practically drooling every time I dropped by a mall. Our landlord, David, was going to Korea for eight months and he needed people to look after his place. It couldn’t be a better match. He left all his things and food (yay!) for us to consume. When I opened his fridge and cupboard, I felt we were kindred spirits. His cupboard had all the exact same things that I had (when in was in Malaysia/Phils). There was Basil, Oregano, different kinds of cheeses, sauces etcetera. There was even ice cream (although I couldn’t imagine anyone enjoying ice cream in this cool climate). So I cooked for our first “baon” (packed lunch) to work and used what was in the kitchen. It was the yummiest meal we had ever since we arrived in NZ! (It was free and of course, since I cooked it.)

Our First Day at Work

Ronnel started work a week before I did. He liked his first day of work. He had tons of stuff to read and a lot of people to meet. He made his first office friend that day. I think his name was Paul (of course there were too many Pauls in his office). Apparently, Paul has stayed in the Philippines for quite some time so they had a lot to talk about. My first day of work was eventful as well. I met my new colleagues and they were really friendly. It was a little bit of culture shock since they were just too “happy”. Their voices were in a different octave than mine and I had a bit of hard time keeping up the energy. And I thought I had enough energy! First thing in the morning, you would hear people greet everybody across the room with a hearty “G’morning” and “It’s a wonderful morning, isn’t it?” I think it is an unwritten rule here to always greet anybody and everybody you see with a “How are ya?” and you have to reply “I’m doing great, and ya?” As how I was in BPI and Standard Chartered on my first days of work, I keep to myself here. I am still adjusting and I have lots of things to absorb. I just smile a lot (my face hurts from smiling) and keep my eyes on my monitor. As I gain more confidence and be familiar with my work and the people around me, I know I will loosen up. Who knows, one day, I’ll be the one shouting; “It’s a beautiful morning, isn’t it?”

Finally, we’re here!   After the long agonizing wait, our work visas have been approved by the New Zealand Immigration Service.  We are now at a hotel resting from the 12- hour flight from the Philippines.  As I’ve promised all those asking us about our “journey” to this beautiful country,  I’m ending my hiatus from blogging with this entry.

Ok, so when and how did we start our journey here? It probably started when the promotion in our last jobs in the Philippines didn’t push through.  Now that we think about it, it was good that the promotion was delayed, otherwise, we wouldn’t think of leaving the country and we’ll be stuck in the Philippines budgeting and scrimping for food.   And so we went to Malaysia since Ronnel received an offer for an analyst programmer position in Maybank.  If you are a friend of ours, you have probably heard of the freak accident he got into and the traumatic experience we both underwent.  But with God’s grace, we pulled through and I even landed a great job in Standard Chartered as a business analyst.  At first, I wasn’t that excited about being a business analyst, especially in Loans division.  My dream was to be a project manager, just as what I was in back in the Philippines.  To top it off, the systems was of a dinosaur age compared to the hi-tech ones we had in Internet Banking.  Soon, I realized that mainframe was our ticket to success.  And so I shelved my project management dreams and focused on being a good business analyst.  I believe I did ok in that field and eventually, I enjoyed being a BA.  Ronnel was being himself in its truest form.  He was good at what he did and taught himself a lot of things.  After a year at work, he was deemed one of the sifus (master) in Maybank as he was consulted with Cardpac matters. 

We had it great in Malaysia. We even thought of settling there for good so we asked around on how we could be permanent residents.  As it turned out, it wasn’t that easy.  An officemate of mine who was non-Malaysian is still a non-resident and considered a foreigner despite being married to a Malaysian for almost over ten years.  Upon my contract renewal in January, I then requested for me to be converted to a permanent staff.  Although I’m reassured that my contract would be renewed every year, it is still disconcerting to know that one too many lousy moves can spark a pre-termination of my contract.  As I’ve told my ex-bosses during my exit interview, having a permanent position would ensure my husband and me that at least one of us was secure.  After the long fight with management, management told me that it was a no go.  They told me and the rest of the contract staff in our team who wanted to be permanent as well, that it was against HR policy to convert and there was no precedent for it.  (But I’d like to give credit to my boss Chooi Lai and Wai Hong then who were really fighting the battle for me, pushing management to make me perm. Even when I tendered my resignation, I was asked if I still wanted to try another round but I refused, not wanting them to go through the whole ordeal again.) By then, Ronnel and I decided that we had to look for a way out.  We quelled our dreams of starting a family and looked for other possibilities.   We explored several options – Canada, US, Australia and the last resort was to go back to the Philippines and look for a better offer.  But for me, that wasn’t an option at all. I love my country but I am not a hypocrite.  I know that we wouldn’t be able to give our future children the life that they deserve if we stayed there.  We could barely pay the bills when we were there especially since we had a huge condo amortization, how would be able to feed another mouth? Our best bet was Australia. It was my dream to go there ever since probably because I adored Steve Irwin so much from watching Animal Planet (God bless his soul).  Ronnel started researching about how we could go there and found out that it wasn’t so simple.  Plus, the job market wasn’t that active for mainframe.  We looked at the map and we saw this small country beside it.  New Zealand.  The first thing that came into my mind was milking cows and roaming sheep.  It probably is the same with you guys.  When everybody heard that we were going to New Zealand, I got all these comments about what will we do there, whether we are going to count sheep or anything.  We try not to be offended since most of the comments were in jest anyway.  So back to my story… Ronnel searched the job market in New Zealand and found a handful of job openings for mainframe programming BUT (yes, a big but) you had to be in New Zealand to qualify for the job.  So we tried another way, Ronnel submitted his application for permanent residency online (just visit immigration.govt.nz for details) but we were not selected because apparently, despite working in IT, his major wasn’t Computer Science so we just didn’t have enough points.   At first, we were disheartened because we were back at square one.  But we couldn’t give up, we already invested time, effort and money (yes, registering for PR costs a lot) and wasn’t about to give up that easily.   And so every day for two consecutive months, Ronnel would check the job sites (jobstuff.co.nz/seek.co.nz) if there were new openings that would consider him.  He continued to submit his CV and the response rate was less than 10% and the responses weren’t too good. They all wanted us to be there first before entertaining us.  And so that’s what we did.  We decided to go there and personally check out the job market.  It was a high risk for both of us but we just thought of it as our second honeymoon trip in case things didn’t work out.  We applied our leaves and made arrangements for our travel to NZ.  At that same week, Ronnel got a positive reply from one of the sites where he submitted his CV.  They wanted to interview him. Prior to that, some other headhunters were also interested in meeting us.  Ronnel got the call from his interviewers a week before we were scheduled to go to NZ.  Ronnel thought that the job interview was a disaster. He had trouble understanding their accents and the phone reception was bad but I think he did great, and so did his interviewers since they wanted to meet him on our trip to NZ. 

And so with nothing but prayers and a bag full of hopes and dreams, we trudged to New Zealand to make the first step in achieving a better future.  We only had more than a week to do what we had to do.  We succumbed to God’s grace and knew that whatever was going to happen was all according to His plans.  All the odds were against us primarily because we were non-residents but we went through the meetings anyway.  It was the height of the winter season when we arrived in the last week of July.  When we met Ronnel’s future bosses in ANZ National Bank, we were ecstatic.  He was a Malaysian who was residing in NZ for more than ten years with his family.  We knew that this was God’s gift to us.  Ronnel’s boss knew exactly how we felt.  He shared how he and his wife went to NZ and decided to stay here for good.  We shared with him our plans of doing the same thing. I think at this point, Ronnel’s IT background and experience was already a done deal.  It was just a matter of whether he had the qualities to fit in and adjust in a new environment.  We went through some other interviews with headhunters and that went fine too. At that time, I also had an interview with Bank of New Zealand.  They had an opening for a project manager at that time and I applied for it but I was told that I still lack the experience to be a PM but if I was interested, I could apply for the Senior Business Analyst contract position that they had.   I went through the interview with HR and I liked the job. It was similar with what I was doing in Standard Chartered but more challenging since the position dealt with multiple applications.  On day 3 of our trip, both Ronnel and I were already jittery because we were both waiting for a call back.  Ronnel was the one who first got a call.  He received a job offer and they gave him what he asked for.  My call soon came and I was asked to go for another interview. This time it would be with the team that I’ll be joining.  The interview went well. I liked my interviewers at sight. I felt genuine warmth and sincerity all throughout the interview and I hoped that the feeling was mutual.  But whatever the outcome of my interview was just an icing on the cake.  Our cake was in Ronnel’s hands.  He got the job and it was a permanent position.  He updated our previous PR application and our points increased.   With these extra points, we were selected and we received an invitation to apply for a PR in NZ.  We couldn’t believe what was happening. It was like our future flashed into our minds and we walked in the park hand in hand with silly grins on our faces.   I pictured myself holding our chubby baby with red cheeks and curly locks.  Everything was falling into place.

We went back to Malaysia and did what we had to do.  We spoke with our respective bosses and relayed what has happened.  Their reactions were a mix of surprise, happiness (for us) and disappointment (for losing us).    Everything was a flurry by then.  Ronnel’s contract was ending soon so he didn’t need to wait long before he went back to the Philippines. He had to go first to make quick arrangements for our Visas. I had to stay back for a while since I had to keep my 1 month notice.  We estimated that everything would be done by two weeks only.  When Ronnel was in the Philippines, I got the call from BNZ and I got the job as well.  Things couldn’t be sweeter.  After several farewell lunches and dinners, I had to say goodbye to the great friends I had in Malaysia.  I bid my last farewells to my bosses and packed my backs and headed back to my husband’s arms. 

Visa processing was however not that easy.  We had to go through a battery of medical exams and a series of documentations.   What’s more, I had to prove that we were a real couple so I scoured for our old love letters and pictures and included those for submission to immigration.  Our medical exams came back and we were told that since they had some findings, they had to send our papers to New Zealand for further review.   That would be a four-week wait.  After four weeks, Ronnel was asked to go for another medical test.  The results had to be sent to NZ again. That would be another four weeks.  Our two-week processing plans became two months.  We were again blessed when our respective future employers agreed to move our start date to wait for us. We knew that the positions were immediate but they decided to wait for us.  That is a real blessing.  It is another indication that our bosses would be great to get along with.  But we were getting frustrated just the same.  It was like our dreams being just at an arm’s length but we couldn’t stretch further to reach it.   When we sat down and thought about it, we realized that it was God’s way of letting us spend time with our families.  I had a little sister to tend to. My father and brother probably miss me a lot.  He had his family to be with.  And so we did just that.  I stayed with my little sister for a few days and I realized how I missed being a big sister.  I took care of her when she was growing up and it brought tears to my eyes to see her as a young pretty lady.  She was growing up to be a real beauty (of course, same genes, remember?).  Ronnel and I also stayed a lot in his parents place. I got to spend more time with them and I realized how I missed having a whole complete family just like what I used to have years back.   We also spent our time with Jack Bauer as we marathoned the entire season of 24.  When we finished with Jack, we watched House, Grey’s anatomy and Korean series. Thanks to my friends at BPI, we had this constant source of entertainment to keep our frustration for the long wait at bay.   

Since I submitted my visa weeks later than Ronnel, I was expecting to be approved later as well.  So we thought that Ronnel had to go to NZ all by himself. It was already mid October and we were worried that our employers would lose patience waiting for us.  It was Saturday, October 14, when the visa officer called.  We were not home and my mother in law just relayed the message to us.   Ronnel was asked to go the immigration office the following Tuesday.  There was no reason given.  We felt a mix of joy and fear at that point.  We so hoped that it was what we’ve long been waiting for but we were also scared that the medical findings might be serious and he’ll be asked to go for another test or so.  Our fears were put to rest when on Monday,  Ronnel received an email from his boss.  Apparently, his boss was already contacted by our visa officer and was told that Ronnel will be given a two year work visa.  He can then proceed to submit his PR application upon arrival in NZ.  We went to the immigration office the next day.  I was happy that he was finally approved but sad at the same time since he’ll be leaving without me.  I still had to wait for my visa to be approved. I told myself it was better that way since I had more time to spend with my own family.   When we went to the office on Tuesday, Ronnel told the officer at the window that he was there to pick up his passport and I was there to follow up on my visa.  We were surprised to see the officer hand us both our passports.  This could mean only one thing. I was going with him to NZ! Ronnel kissed my forehead in glee right there and then in front of the other visa applications.  It was PDA but the hell we care, we were going to NZ!!!

It was a flurry of activity for everybody in our last days in the Philippines.  We only had four days left before we leave.   We couldn’t make our employers wait another day longer.  We owed them that much.  God was with us every step of the way then. What normally takes days to process, we did in half a day.  It was against my principles to use my father’s connections but we were in a dire situation so we had no choice.  We had to get our Overseas Exit Clearance fast.  When we arrived in POEA, there were about two hundred people about to attend the seminar.  We attended this before and so we knew what to expect. We were hoping to skip the seminar and just get our OEC’s.  It was another blessing that we came across a friend of my father who was working in there. She wasn’t a mere employee, she was the head and so she called the shots.  She assigned a staff to assist us and in a few minutes, we had our OEC’s.  Another hurdle we overcame was the availability of seats bound to NZ. Apparently, all the seats in Qantas have been booked.  We wanted Qantas over PAL and other airlines since we had a chance to bring 40 kilos each of luggage.  It wasn’t enough to bring all our things but it would do.  The only confirmed booking was on November 2.  That was too far along.  We had about three travel agencies helping us with our travel arrangements.  One of them confirmed the booking for Saturday, October 21 but there was a hitch, we could only bring 20 kilos each.  That wouldn’t do.  My perfumes and cosmetics alone were already ten kilos.  We begged the travel agency officer to help us make arrangements.  We were told that only migrants were allowed to bring 40 kilos each. Since we were only holding work visas (not resident visas), we only had 20 kilos.  We then implored her to do the best that she could to give us that extra 20 kilos.  Again, God helped us. A few hours after I spoke with our travel agent, we got the message that our 40 kilos request was granted. Life was sweet.

In the last four days, we shopped for clothes.  It would be a complete wardrobe overhaul since it would be freezing in NZ if we went there with our usual sandos and shorts.  Ronnel had to wear a suit to work (I can’t keep my eyes off him in a suit just like in our wedding day) and I suppose I had to wear the same thing as well.   We bought shoes and thick socks to match.  Everything was going as planned. It was unfortunate though that my father was leaving for a business trip on Friday and he won’t be able to send us off when we leave on Saturday.  We had a farewell dinner on Thursday instead.  My father, brother, sister, Ronnel and I had buffet dinner and stuffed ourselves with enough food to last the year.  It was like we were also stuffing ourselves with memories to last several years.  It would be a long time before we would be able to sit on a table together again.  I had to say goodbye to my mother via phone only since she was also out of the country. 

On Friday, we had another farewell dinner and invited both sides of the family.  Ronnel’s family was so extended, it took up three tables. They were a happy bunch. I knew that I was in good hands with them.  Most of my relatives were in Bicol so I only had one table to fill.  We were happy, we felt how everyone was happy for us and it shone through the room. 

When the day came, we couldn’t describe our feelings.  We were sad that we were leaving in a hurry and that we won’t be able to be with our families anymore.  I was sad that I didn’t have enough time to spend with my little sister.  I hope that she reads the long letter I wrote her once in a while to remember me by.  Together with Ronnel’s family, we left their home at around 2 pm. It was hours before our 8:30 pm flight but Ronnel just wanted to make sure.  We had to fetch my sister, aunt and brother who wanted to send us off as well.  We brought two cars to accommodate everybody.  It was a good thing that we left early because we came across several obstacles. First, was our car’s tire had a minor puncture so air was coming out. It wasn’t a full flat tire yet so we could still drive to my father’s place to replace it with another car.  Second, on our way to my brother, my in-laws’ car got hit by a cab.   Good thing it was minor but we had to wait for a while to call in the police and report the incident.  Thank God for insurance.   At this point, we lost that extra hour cushion that we had.  When we picked up my brother, we changed cars and so that solved the probable flat tire problem.  We arrived at the terminal early and unloaded our luggage.  On our way in, we were told that we were in the wrong airport.  What’s that law again? Something about things are bound to go wrong once it starts going wrong. 

We were now at the correct terminal.  We made sure of that.  When we went in, I knew that there was another thing that was bound to go wrong. I was just waiting for the shoe to drop.   It dropped sooner that I thought.  Our luggage was over by 21 kilos.  I didn’t want to pay excess (Imagine, AUD 24 for each kilo? No way!)  So we had to start unpacking and unloading stuff from our puffy ready-to-burst luggage.  So imagine me with my bottom on the floor of the wide terminal lobby, with our luggage open and sprawled on the floor.  Quick decisions must be made and things had to be discarded.  I had to remove clothes, some cleaning items and some shoes.   Good thing, my in-laws were still outside waiting for us to leave.   I sprinted like I never sprinted before, running here and there to deliver things out of the airport.  There was no room for embarrassment as people looked on what was happening with this husband and wife with several bags open in the middle of the terminal.  After several re-weighs, we were still out by over ten kilos.  Another passenger offered her help. I asked her if she could bring some of our stuff in. She said yes. Thank God.  I was ashamed for a while to think that she might run away with the bag so I gave her a full plastic bag of dried mangos and sinigang mixes to bring.  But it was a situation that asks for trust and so, I gave her that. She was with her husband and kids bound to Australia and so she had lots of extra kilos to spare.   The battle with the luggage was finally over and so I told my in-laws that they didn’t have to expect me sprinting out of the terminal anymore with another batch of unloaded stuff.  But even with our check in luggage, we still had our hand carries to worry about.  Ronnel had his back pack full of documents and our beloved Magic Sing Mic.  I had this humongous red bag and two more small bags.  We both were wearing two jackets and it was scorching hot.  I knew we looked funny but there was no time for laughter.  But I think the Qantas officer found it funny so he allowed us to go in with all those stuff.

When we went in, as usual, security was strict.  I was scared that they’d spot my pirated mp3’s CD’s of OPM and Taebo.  Those two CD’s are the dearest to me and I couldn’t let go of them, especially since it was my brother who gave me the OPM CD.  When we were about to board the plane, the other passenger who helped us with our stuff approached us.  She was worried that she won’t see us anymore when we land in Sydney so she gave us the plastic bag that I asked her to bring.  I thanked her profusely and chastised myself for doubting her one bit.

Finally, we were on board.  It was going to be a long flight but neither of us had the energy to talk. We were too absorbed in our thoughts. We prayed the rosary for a while and went back to thinking about our future.  Soon, it was Sydney, our stop over.  We had to wait a few hours before our next flight to Wellington so I did what I loved to do – shop! Duty free had a promotion so I took advantage of it.  My husband was in a good mood and so he indulged me.   When we arrived Wellington airport, we were greeted by a wonderful surprise. The immigration officer inspecting our passports was Filipino! He asked where we’ll be working and wished us all the best.  He was really friendly.  Galing ng pinoy!  At the customs area, we were asked to declare all food and other biological stuff we brought from the Philippines.  I was worried they’d ask me about the atsuete and sinigang mix since I didn’t know what it was called in English. Good thing, they didn’t ask too much questions.

So we’re here now in our hotel room, rested and ready to hunt for apartments. Tomorrow is Ronnel’s first day at work while I will be viewing some apartments.  I will start work on Monday, October 30.

With everything that has happened, we always knew that there was a divine force that guided us through all of this.  I am glad I’m married to a man whose faith is deeply rooted as mine.  I know going overseas is not always the answer and the way to a better future, but this is it for us.  We will be spending the rest of our lives here and we will definitely make the most out of it.  God lead us here for a reason.  I promised Him that we’ll be active in church.  We had been eyeing one of the churches here and we plan to check it out soon.  It’s a small price to pay for everything that we have received so far. I know that our journey doesn’t end here.  We plan to start a family soon, buy a house, a car, not in that order, of course. 

To those who wish to follow the same path we’ve chosen, I cannot guarantee you’ll end up where we are now.  Note that everything that has happened to us caught us by surprise as well.   It was all a combination of hard work, sheer luck and prayers.   And always believe in karma or that golden rule where you do not do unto others yada yada.  That’s one thing my husband and I have in common (despite all our differences) and I admire him more for that.  In times where we are tempted to do something wrong, he always tells me to ask ourselves, “Is it worth selling our soul to the devil?”  It may sound trite but this has helped us veer away from serious stuff.  We are not sinless of course, especially me.  I have had several enemies along the way, too many to count and because of my husband, I learned to be more tolerant and understanding of others.  I am glad that I had made peace with my last sort-of enemy.  We will never be good friends anymore but at least we were able to smile at each other again.  It is one thorn plucked from my heart and I can sleep better at night.   Okay, enough of this.   I’m beginning to preach when I have no right to do so.  So there you go, that’s the whole story of our journey to this land of the kiwis. We were able to achieve our goal and I hope that God blesses you the same way. 

Tonight, I’d like you to close your eyes. Imagine that you are inside your dream house. It could be the two-storey house that you’ve always dreamt of as a child. Or that wide space condo unit that you’ve wanted to have.  It could be homey, with the scent of family and newly-baked cookies. Or it could be that high tech posh space with Plasma TV and high-end technology. It’s your choice. It’s your dream house. You go to the living room and admire your surroundings. You go to the kitchen and see a bounty of food prepared to satiate your hunger.  And then you go decide to go outside to breathe some fresh air, you open the door. Now, kindly open your eyes. You open your eyes and you see this.  (show picture of mountainous garbage)

This is what’s outside your dream house— a mountainous collection of garbage. The stench will mingle with the flavorful smell of your food. The stinky liquid will seep into your front door and creep into your living room.   Soon, it will be crawling into your house as the volume increases and your dream house transforms into a nightmare.

Dramatic isn’t it? But it can happen, you know. And it has happened.  Real people have woken up next to wastelands.  You could be next.

So what can we do prevent this? What else, but RECYCLE!

Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. Too corny. Too much effort. Too stressful. Not really.  You don’t need to go to extremes and make your own compost pit or re-use toilet paper.  What I’m going to give you are simple tips in recycling that even your 6-year brother or sister can easily follow.

There are two ways of recycling — R & R.

One is to re-sell and the other is re-use.

Let’s talk about what items you can re-sell. Resell, because the item is sold once and you’re selling it again, although it’s not at its orginal state.  Well, when you look at your own place, there could be a lot of things to sell – old newspapers, magazines and bottles. There are shops that buy broken appliances.   When you sell, you not only help reduce the garbage but you earn money too. If you feel generous, you can go the extra mile and donate your old clothes, shoes or bags to Salvation Army or any charitable organization. I believe there are lots of old folk’s homes here.

So what happens to these items when you sell them? They are refurbished to make it into something useful again.  Empty glass bottles and jars can be recycled to make things like decorative paving and aggregate for asphalt or swimming pool filters, as well as new glass jars and bottles. Newspapers are recycled into paperboard, new newsprint, insulation and animal bedding products. Empty aluminium drink cans are sent overseas for recycling and can be recycled again and again. Recycled aluminium cans are sorted, crushed and baled into "bricks" for transporting. These bricks are fed into a hot furnace where the aluminium melts and the melted aluminium is then cast into smaller ingots which are processed into new aluminium cans. Steel cans that have contained anything from baked beans to fruit cocktail, pet food or soup can be recycled to make new cars and bridges

The other way to recycle is to re-use these items yourself.
In the office, when you print, try printing front and back. If it cant be help, you can use the unprinted back portion for scribbling notes.  You can be a little creative and turn it into a new notebook.   When you order dinner, you can wash and re-use the plastic containers for your take away food.

When shopping, you will have several plastic bags. If you can use just one big bag, do so. Otherwise, keep all the plastic bags and use as to cover your rubbish bins.  I will show you an easy way of folding your plastic bags so that you can keep them in an orderly manner.

First, flatten the bag. Fold it in half lengthwise. Fold it again. Then fold the edge into a small triangle until it reaches the edge. Then clip the last fold so that it won’t get lose. There, just like that.

Now, you know how to fold your shopping bags. It just takes less than one minute!

Following either of the two ways to recycle is your choice. It’s simple to remember… To recycle, just R and R.. Resell or Re- use. You can follow choose to re-sell or re-use. It could even be your choice to continue with your wasteful ways and opt not recycle.  But I tell you, don’t blame me, if one day, you open the door of your house and a pile of garbage come rolling down to your face.  Your dream house can really turn into a nightmare. So better do something about it now, before it’s too late…

Do you feel your heart beat faster when you see this 4-letter word plastered on shop windows? Do you feel nauseous around October during the nationwide Mega sale?

Then, be prepared. You might be suffering from the same disease that I have. The clinical term for this disease is Compulsive Shopping Addiction or Shopaholism and the one who has acquired this disease is called a “Shopaholic”.

Yes, I am a Shopaholic. I am at a stage where I am battling with this disease and hopefully, eventually, be cured of it.

But first, how do you know if you are a Shopaholic?

There are several criteria in determining if you have Shopaholism.  In the US, patients undergo several interviews and even go through hypnosis to determine what stage in the disease.  Basically, there are the 10 questions that you must ask yourself.  1 or 2 Yeses are still acceptable for a normal shopper. 3–5 is already a case of mild Shopaholism. 6 onwards is a cause for alarm.

1. Do you shop when you are upset or depressed?

2. Do you buy things you don’t really need?

3. Do you have multiple credit cards with high outstanding amounts?

4. Do you feel excited when shopping, but depressed or anxious at a later point.

5. Do you have many unopened and unused items at home?

6. Do you lie about the amount of money you have spent?

7. Do you continue to shop even if you are in debt?

8. Have your shopping sprees caused issues in your relationships?

9. Do you think often about money and shopping?

10. Do you feel that your shopping has become out of control?

I took the test myself and found that I have answered Yes to 4 questions. Sadly and reluctantly, I have to accept that I am inflicted with this disease.

I only discovered that I had this disease when I came across Sophie Kinsella’s novel, Confessions of a Shopaholic. I related so much with the character that I began to reflect on whether I had the same problem.  It bothered me so much so I logged on the Internet to search on Shopaholism. Never did I expect to find such information!

A group of doctors from Stanford University is doing a study on how many are suffering from this disease.  Shopaholism is clinically defined as a psychological disease "motivated by ‘irresistible’ impulses, characterized by spending that is excessive and inappropriate, has harmful consequences for the individual, and tends to be chronic and stereotyped."  Compulsive shoppers "binge buy" — most often clothes, shoes, makeup, and jewelry — and then suffer intense guilt. That, in turn, helps trigger another frenzied trip to the mall, and the cycle continues.

The study came up with the statistics that one out of 20 is suffering from this disease.  You might think that it only afflicts women, but no, there are several reported cases of men Shopaholics. If women concentrate on clothes, shoes, jewelries and fashion accessories, men shopaholics tend to buy CD’s, car accessories, electronics and other gadgets.

But you may ask, so what if I am a Shopaholic? As long as I have money to buy, then it’s my problem right? I tell you, it’s not as simple as that. There was a time that I had to think of side businesses to keep up with my shopping habits. It brought out the entrepreneur in me but I was stressed out.  There have also been reported cases of broken marriages due to Shopaholism. One patient got fired from her job because she spent most of her time doing online shopping. There are other people who neglect their children and park them in the mall constantly because that is what they need to feed their habit.

In my case, our marriage was threatened by this compulsion. My husband often scolded me before for shopping too much. There’s this formula that I use when he asks me about how much I spent shopping. It’s the Actual Price divided by two times the current inflation rate. Let’s just say that the price is sheer fiction. Even now, I am occupying 2/3 of the whole kitchen since I had lots of supply. Some ingredients are near expiration date, as I never get to use them.  There was a time I had a compulsion to shop for matching items. I wanted to follow the Matching Principle, you see. It means my blouse should match my pants and my bag should match the color of my belt and shoes. When I was in the Philippines, I had a whole cupboard full of matching items and it was a dilemma for me on how to bring everything here.  I ended up having excess baggage. 

Studies are still being done to find out the root cause of this disease.  Some say it is triggered by depression. Some say it is due to environment we live in.  For me, I think it is hereditary. My mom is an even worse Shopaholic than I am. When she buys clothes, she buys 5 of the same item in different colors.  When I was little, we went grocery shopping every week—and we buy the same items every time. No wonder, at one time, we had 20 cans of sardines and 10 bags of sugar. I grew up in that environment, thinking that buying like that was normal.

It is only now that I realize that it is a problem. My mom is now facing some financial problems as her income has not been able to cope with her spending.  I am scared that I might face the same problem one day. When she had to part with her belongings, she was able to raise a big amount of money. She was able to fill up a whole warehouse with her belongings.  I realize that I don’t want to reach that kind of stage someday, where I have to part with my wonderful things because I am broke.

So what should we Shopaholics do to be cured of this disease? 

Well, there are some simple steps to follow:

(1) Get rid of your credit cards, checkbooks, and ATM cards before you go shopping. Use only cash.

(2) If you spot something that you would like to purchase, never allow yourself to purchase it on the spot. Instead, walk away and give yourself a “mandatory waiting period” (or if you must– ask the store to hold it for you. Most stores will hold items for their customers for at least a day). If you still want the item in a few days, then you can go back and make your thought-out purchase.

(3) Make a budget and put it on paper. Give yourself some “mad money” for each month, and do not allow yourself to purchase anything that is not in the budget.

(4) Write down everything you purchase for two weeks; groceries, gas for your car, the electric bill, and even that candy bar from the vending machine! This will make your more conscience of where your hard-earned dollars are going. Being more aware of your spending will also make your more in control.

(5) If you are overwhelmed with debt, contact a credit-counseling agency. There are several non-profit organizations whose goal is to get your out of debt. They will help you consolidate your bills into a smaller monthly payment, and get your credit report in good standing once more.

If you are suffering from a serious case, then you can go to a doctor and he might prescribe you with inhibitor drugs such as Prozac. Yes, there are even drugs for this disease now.  It is that serious.

So, are you going to be the next Imelda Marcos with her 3,000 pairs of shoes or Princess Diana with her large collection of clothes?  Have you even admitted to yourself that you are a potential Shopaholic? Decide now before it’s too late…

Have you ever felt insignificant in your life?  Ever had the feeling that you don’t exist? That what you do doesn’t matter at all?  Don’t fret. Everybody has felt this at one point in his life. As a human being, it is in our nature to toil with thoughts of insignificance throughout life. 

I had the same thoughts when I joined Scope a year ago. I had no friends. I knew nobody. And I was stationed in Menara Axis where there were no Filipinos at all.  My work didn’t make me feel any better. I was working as a temporary administrator – which is just another word for a gofer. Go for this. Go for that. Email this. Email that.  I was working as that because I had no choice.  I had to or my husband and I would have nothing to eat – literally. It was the time when he got into an accident and he had to stop work and depend on me for a while. I felt so insignificant, so small since I couldn’t do anything more.  My CV didn’t matter anymore. It didn’t matter that I was a Project Manager in my previous company or that I used to negotiate deals with executives from foreign banks.  I could step no further. I was given this simple job and I had to do it right. But oh, I felt so small.

I felt depressed. I had so little things to do then. I finished doing all those administrative tasks and don’t have anything to do so I surfed the Internet and came across this story. It was a story that changed my view on lowly jobs. It goes like this:

One day the different parts of the body were having an argument about which should be in charge.
The brain said "I do all the thinking so I’m the most important and I should be in charge."
The eyes said "I see everything and let the rest of you know where we are, so I’m the most important and I should be in charge."
The hands said "Without me we wouldn’t be able to pick anything up or move anything. So I’m the most important and I should be in charge."
The stomach said "I turn the food we eat into energy for the rest of you. Without me, we’d starve. So I’m the most important and I should be in charge."
The legs said "Without me we wouldn’t be able to move anywhere. So I’m the most important and I should be in charge."
Then the rectum, or that little hole in the ass, said, "I think I should be in charge."  All the rest of the parts said "YOU?!?  You don’t do anything!  You’re not important! You can’t be in charge."
So the rectum closed up.  After a few days, the legs were all wobbly, the stomach was all queasy, the hands were all shaky, the eyes were all watery, and the brain was all cloudy. They all agreed that they couldn’t take any more of this and agreed to put the rectum in charge.
The moral of the story?  There’s no such thing as an insignificant role. Everybody has a part to play in this grand thing we call life. I looked at my job differently then. So what if I did nothing from 9 to 6 but forward emails? So what? It was still a job that was delegated to me and I had to do my best. I believe that outlook has paved the way for where I am now. My supervisor then saw my potential and recommended me to RLS. In RLS, I also started that way. I did nothing but log problems, do minutes of meeting and attendance. It didn’t matter to me. It was a job that I have to do and I had to give my best. I didn’t think much of the fact that I was underemployed and underpaid. I was still in a stage that I had to prove myself to them. This year, they had renewed me and gave me more responsibility. I believe I have garnered their trust and confidence—enough for them to make me RLS’ sole business analyst.  I have made friends within the team. I had made friends with other Filipinos as well. I can proudly say I don’t feel I’m insignificant now. But I would have never reached this place if I had dwelt on my feeling of insecurities and insignificance a year ago. This is what I want to share with you all. It is alright to feel insignificant, it is natural, even. But what is not right, is to let this affect how you work and how you deal with others. Honestly, I still have these feelings sometimes. It is a fact that I am a businessperson trying to survive in the world of programmers. But so what?   So what if like the ass hole, we do the dirty stuff? Do you think we will survive if our cleaning ladies didn’t attend to our toilets? How do you think the city will survive without the garbage collectors and septic tank companies?
Just think about this. No matter what kind of work you do. It matters. It really does.

Tonight, I’d like to talk about something Universal. It goes beyond race, age educational background or social class. It’s this little thing that we call Love.

Now there are several types of love. You have the love between a mother and child. Love between siblings. Love between friends. And the most interesting of all, is the love between a guy and a girl. It is so interesting that almost everything refers to it— Movies, music, paintings and books.  Since it’s such a broad topic, I’d like to narrow it down by talking about the fun stuff—the love between a guy and a girl before they jump into marriage.

You see, I have a hobby of observing people.  In my previous speech, I mentioned about reading signatures. I even mentioned about fortune telling. Well, now, I’m sharing with you my discoveries after observing the people around me who have been struck by cupid’s arrow. 

It doesn’t matter if you’re sweet sixteen or near-death ninety. When you fall in love, you just fall—whether there’s someone to catch you or not. But of course, everybody in this room will agree with me, that it’s better to fall with somebody who has fallen for you as well.  So let’s talk about that, love that’s mutual.

From my past experiences and from my observance of friends and family around me, I have concluded that there are five stages of love between a guy and a girl before they get married.

Let’s start with the first stage, Stage “F” or Friends. Of course, there’s always love at first sight but even then you still have to get to know the person first, right? So you start off being friends. It could be a sincere act of wanting to be friends or maybe you already have the hots for the guy but it’s always the first step to “reach” that person. You go out with a group of friends, enjoy common hobbies and interests and eventually get to know each other. Now, if you both like what you see, you start opening to each other more—share problems, dreams and fears. You begin to take special care of that person and put him in a higher position than your other friends.

Then you advance to the second stage, “SF” or Special Friends. Special Friends are those who care for each other more than they mean or want to.  You tend to do things with out thinking first. This is the scariest stage since you don’t know whether what you’re feeling is friend love or that other kind of love. This is the stage where most friendships fail since the love is unrequited. But let’s not talk about sad things. Let’s say the feeling is mutual but you just don’t know that it’s there. At this day and age, guys are not the only one who can make the first move. We girls can do it too but be careful that you don’t put the guy off or you’ll never get to the succeeding stages. We girls can subtly make moves where you can persuade the guy to make the first moves. It’s part of our charms. I’ve seen my girl friends do such things and I think I have done some moves in my younger years too. But be very careful. We girls should never assume. This has been the downfall of some, because they assumed the guy liked them. You see, you can never say a guy likes you UNLESS he says it in front of you. Now, once one of you drops hints of liking the other, then you can openly talk about it. But the thing is, you are not sure just yet. I mean, it could possibly be that you’re always together and you’ll naturally feel attached.

So you both go on to the next stage – “SO”.  Secret On or commonly known as MU- Mutual Understanding. It’s the stage where you are sure that you’re not just friends but you’re not quite sure if you’re ready for a commitment. So you decide to keep it to yourselves so that it’s not that embarrassing if you break it off after a week or so. This is the stage where you feel oh so lovey-dovey but can’t tell anyone yet since you promised each other not to. This is the discovery stage too, where you sort out your feelings on whether you wish to proceed to the next level which is “ON”.

“ON” is the stage where you go steady. Here, you can shout out to the rest of the world that he is your guy and you’re his girl. You can go HHWWSST – which is short for Holding Hand While Walking Swaying Swaying Too.  In this stage, you are the apple of his eye and your world will probably revolve around him.  This is the stage where you feel high or drugged, where you are oblivious to the things happening around you and you feel like you’re floating in mid-air. This is where your face glows and you feel more beautiful than ever. You’re wearing an expression that says “I AM IN LOVE and I’m the luckiest girl or guy in the world.” 

You continue on like this for a couple of weeks, even months but reality sets in and it’s time for you to decide whether you wish to advance to the next level which is SR– “Serious Relationship.” This is the stage where you see your partner as a real person.  Time is a key ingredient in this stage.  By time, I don’t mean just quantity but quality as well. It doesn’t count that you’ve been steady for ten years but you just see each other once a year. In this stage, your partner steps down from that pedestal you put him in and you see him as who he or she really is. You either find out that his feet smells or that she spends five hours in a salon.  Here, you get a reality check and contemplate on whether you are ready to spend the rest of your nights sleepless beside a guy who snores or with a girl whose mother you cannot stand.

It is in this stage where you ask yourself, are you ready to take the plunge to marital vows? If you are, then good luck! There is still a lot of stages in marital life and all those rings – engagement ring, wedding ring, suffering, boring. But that’s another story altogether. But it could be also in this stage that you realize that he or she is not the “One” and that you can’t go on with the SR stage. And so you break if off. If this happens, you’re back in Stage 1. And the cycle continues.

Now, you ask me, what is the relevance of knowing all these stages? Well, knowing these stages can help you in your current or future relationships. With this knowledge, you can identify what stage you are in and if you are ready to move on to the next level or not. But don’t take these stages seriously since they’re not clear cut. Some relationships skip all stages 1-4 and just jump to Stage 5 and succeed. Some relationships go through all stages and in the end back to stage 1 with somebody else.

I am no expert. I am just someone who have gone through these five stages — enjoyed them  and survived.  So, I ask you, what stage are you in now?